So What?

So what if everyday I end up curled into a scared little ball?
So what if my life seems to drag on between each study hall?
Those are the days that I get to see you
But those are the days I see you with her, too
Who cares if I'm a little jealous of her?
Who'd miss me if I didn't exist anymore?
You'd have her so it's not like I'd be missed
So I'll just go die now and hope you're not pissed
Pissed at who I am
Pissed at what I am
Its like "She had her chance"
And now she's ruining my one chance at romance!
Yes its true
I do love you
But…some days when I see you
And then I see you see her too
Its like I don't even exist
And she's the one who stole your kiss!
She is the only reason I'm ever scared
She the only one about whom you've ever cared
You say you're over her
Well then prove it to me, mister
Tell me I'm all that you see
Tell me that it's always been me
Don't lie
Don't cry
Just set me free
If you don't want me
You say she's your best friend
And that I'm your girlfriend
But how can I compare
To a girl with those eyes and that hair
But just when I want to give up hope
You do something that makes my heart choke
You do care I suppose
But she ruins me as she goes
She doesn't know
Or does she though?
Its like she knows that it kills me inside
And that is why she's hurting my pride
You don't even care
When she gives me that death glare
You just smile at her
Probably wishing you'd have chosen her!
You don't even pretend to listen
When I tell you with conviction
That I'm scared for my life
You think this is a joke in strife
You don't look me in the eye
When you tell me not to cry
Are you laughing at me?
How could this be?
You look at me in a way that's heartfelt
Ways that each time makes my heart melt
But then I realize something important
That I'm sometimes the one who's ignorant
To what we have here
That everything I do I want you near
So how can I get mad at you?
When I do those same things, too?
So now I'll try to stop
If it means that I'm the faithful one who comes out on top
Because though it kills me to see her with you
When you aren't near me, when you aren't true
I understand that you loved her
And I know that you come with her attached
But does she have to hate me?
When all I ever did was make you happy?
So I will not give up
I will not let this girl come between us
I long to hate you everyday
But when I see you, that hate melts away
Leaving nothing but pure joy
For when I see you, I know you're my boy
This is the reason why I will try
To live on my own with you near by
She is something I must overcome
But with you at my side it can be done
I love you in an unconditional way
And I know that with me you will stay
Even if she is your best friend
Your trials and tribulations will end
I will always be here for you forever
As I was when she said 'never'
To you and your friendship that night
I was here when you wanted someone to hold you tight
And I will be here, at your side
Continuously standing here after she has lied
To you again and again
For when you are done with her and ready to begin
A new with me
Who has always been here for you
So promise that this will last
And I will say that I will have a blast
With you forever more
She had your heart at one time
But now I have you and I'm ready for the climb
For us to be together

Forever and ever.

[Again, old poem]

[Probably at the end of the school year]

[Written about _ _ _ _ _]

[I really felt that way.]